Ode To A River

 Ripple away, fair river -

caressing each stone

as if it were your own.

Loving it,

until, one day, it erodes...

& becomes a part of us all

The Forest

They tell me;

Say, nothing is better than

'this' or 'that'.

But,

have you ever been

blissfully alone?

hearing rare, your own mind,

only bluebirds and the skies.

& as you sink into peace,

opening eyes,

you stare straight up -

& just as you do,

a wish flower pass by.

you feel such bliss,

close your eye

& pass judgement, that

If ever within such happiness,

one could die

& ne'er have a regret.

For, what a beautiful life. ♡

Free Love

sometimes

we lose sight

of love

& of each other.

when the windows cry

all muddy

from last night's words.

but outside

it seems so clean

so free.

"That's me"

she said, smiling.

That's who I want to be.

Free.

A Little Bit More

Every

today

is a little bit better

than yesterday...

Today my mind is wiser,

breaths taste sweeter,

friends grow closer,

and my heart be more rich

than it had ever before.

Every today

is a little bit better

for I,

am a little bit more.

Sewn

I am so sad
most the time,
I dont see why.

I try to look at the positive,
every single instance, every single time.
But even when I see,
how happiness is in the distance;
Coming, and I can spot it,
I know I've felt it,
and I remind myself of the "how could I have even been sad?" moments
It never matters.
Because the down moments last longer,
they're worse,
they eat me.
Taking pieces out of my skin.

It's as if I was being chewed on,
then sewn up.
& every time I am sewn,
they say "all better now"
and it is better.
Until I am chewed on again.
Until I am told how good being sewn is,
again.

I am a tired ragdoll
being chewed and sewn,
chewed and sewn.
Pieces of me gone,
parts of me hanging, damaged,
but I keep going, I keep existing.
Just to be chewed again
sewn again.

The Deep End

Agony,
again.
I miss you
my friend.

Empty briefcase,
idiot idol.
Forget my name,
kill my recital.

I am nothing,
no one
ever.
For, I let you go.
I'm drowning against the river.
Tear my heart
from among the dividends.
Net my love
with the weeds and loose ends.

I am a fool.
I miss you, deep end.

Esteem

I am ugly.
Naked fruit
To be sampled
By the masses.

Punch One Love

You should remember,
Right?
The way it Hits me
in photographs
against the light.
Where the marks make me,
and the toll takes me
& I'm left to the river by the sea.
Just a sandlot,
with a speck of me.

Reborn

Make haste...

I was living for yesterday;

all this time 

I have wasted.

Rebirth my eyes,

& I will breathe for today;

it is the day 

I become infinity,

the day 

nothing touches my body.

My brain feeds my inner purity

& I reach for the stars,

that were always mine.

Crazy Aunt Curry

Nothing

    good...

nothing good ever came

from a branch

stuck 

in the window

of your aunt's house.

Black tangled 

ivy, running

through eyelashes.

Sweating 

lips.

Crumbs

on the soap

of dishes last-night...

Nothing

   good

can come.

A Song for Saturday

So sweet were the branches,

the perches for folks,

who laugh and sing

at thoughtful jokes.

Who sit & give you

all their smiles.

On this simple summer's Saturday.

The Wrongs of Gods In Sheep's Clothing

Before the light, before the rain,

before we had anyone;

They came by Nile during the day

to benefit the wrong-love.

Been versed in violence; held, be vain-

until yesterday came upon them...

Erase Me

I want to be free, like the ocean.

Erase all the salt,

be covered in milk.

Pure white, like oppression.

There is a spot,

it's land.

Yet all I see

is water.

Dense as a sand storm

pulling me  to the bottom;

down

down

into all of its pity.

Letting go

the last breath.

A bubble of air.

I smile

as the sea takes me

in my tangled glory.

& I give it myself.

Thanking me;

my body goes

down

down.

The System

No one cares,

you're a lost cause.

Emptied their wallets,

found no odds.

They say you,

though, I think them flawed.

Embrace your fellow human,

they're all you've got;

In this world of...

malice, hatred, hot -

Forsaken place

money had bought.

See Me

I wish I was made of windows,
so you could see right through me. 
I’m drowning in this muck,
what mud!
& nobody can view me. 
I am, I live,
I love & breathe;
some may say,
A being! 
But tragedy is as tragedy goes,
& nobody believes me. 
So I’ll sit right here & wrinkle my nose 
until you open your eyes 
to meet me.

Grandpa's Root Beer Bar

Somewhere inside,

I am what makes me,

me.

Deep within the joy

of a simple Root Beer,

Icy & cold.

Nostalgia fills my tongue

& I am lost in summertime -

Motorcycle rides,

dripping popsicle on my good shoes.

Empty, maybe - That it be anything of importance;

That  dusty beverage on the shelf.

Well, maybe to someone else.

But here,

somewhere inside,

there is the joy

and what makes me, me.

Post Traumatic Stress

SUBMISS

& I did.

For it is I that hath been beaten

held like a bird by the foot,

cradled by claws

'til my final killing come.

I am a roman numeral IXII,

noises from a past life

take me to the dark side,

& I eat the ghoulish petals

of those poppies gone black.

For nothing else satisfies 

the shadow I harvest inside;

I hold remnants, eaten so unhealthily..

Until I can somehow turn them to gold instead,

but gold is only in their head...

The Deepest Wish

Carry this pocket watch,

my shallow heart's-dream.

I will be grateful

to have ever been seen.

Let Me Love You Full and Loud

Please tell me

the thing you disliked the most about me,

because all I ever asked

was to feel your arms around me.

I let my heart go,

let it abound me,

and now all I'm left with

is a darkness surround me.

I wish you would have let me

be all you knew to be,

I wish I could have become

all you needed.

I crave

for the day

you see my eyes

and ask me to be more than yours,

always for you.

I want to be

someones' everything,

more than I wish to breathe.

I want to make

someone my always,

been waiting

an eternity.

All the ways

you wish to be loved,

I want to make it seen.

Let me love you

full and loud,

then scream your heart at me.

I have lost my knees,

I am weak;

empty heart,

failed thieves

tried to steal

all I am ,

in my mind,

my heart,

my grief -

but no one's seen

and no one's touched

anything

like me.